Existing to Work

He wakes up exhausted. The weary man. Crawling out of bed fatigued. He walks, drained down the hall, to the kitchen for his morning coffee. Glancing out the window, worn out from yesterday. He…

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Managing During Coronavirus Time

I am writing this post from a small village call Schaijk, in the province of North Brabant in The Netherlands. I do not live here, but I passed most of the pandemic here.

I’m not particularly eager to write about my private life, but under exceptional circumstances, I decided to share some of my story’s bits. I tried to put some order in the last two months' chaos… but it’s a challenge!

Beginning of March 2020, everyone has heard about Corona or COVID-19. I live in Barcelona, and we are confined at home. We cannot get out, to do groceries, but alone.

From a personal perspective, this means to be in an apartment, with a little balcony for an unknown time, from the beginning, this is mentally tough, for everybody.

On the professional side, this means that a company used to be collocated in the office, now suddenly, we have to embrace remote, with family, and kids at home, like everyone else.

I am lucky to work at New Relic, they offer help to receive a screen if you need one, and even some amount of money to get a chair or table.

For me, this is the first time I am managing full-remote teams. Second big change, after being closed at home, time to adapt, time to read, and sharing experiences among colleagues.

We build some plans quickly, and with the extraordinary work of our engineers, we manage to start delivering under challenging circumstances.

First learning, be flexible, adaptable, and understanding. We are not working remotely, and we are doing our best in the middle of an unprecedented crisis. So normal remote tips & tricks do not necessarily work now.

This is time to understand and know a bit more about your colleagues and how you can help them with some free time, less challenging work, or helping them to travel back home and be with their families.

Few days after the confinement, we realize that my fiancee is pregnant 😮. It is time to react, find a hospital in the middle of this situation, and go through the first eco to confirm the pregnancy as safe as possible. I’m not allowed to go in, so I have to wait at the entrance.

We took two taxies, only one person per taxi, a bizarre feeling my fiancee is in front of me, going through our first eco, and the only thing I can do is… wait.

We’re totally excited, and just thinking about how we are going to share the news with my parents, and my mother-in-law (or mother-in-love like she used to say).

We were not expecting to have to share this news through a video call, but it is the only way now. This reminds me of when I was living in Berlin for years, and how helpful it was to have Skype / Whatsapp to keep connected with your loved ones.

Second learning, technology made our life a bit easier, use the tools you have available to make the most of it. I’m looking at you Snap Camera!

This helps as well to have some fun with friends. With Snap Camera I even created a background of one of my favorites bars, so at night talking with friends, at least I see a different environment than a white wall.

A couple of weeks of knowing we are expecting, unfortunately, my mother-in-law is diagnosed with Corona, and it is going bad, really bad.

Remember, we are in the middle of confinement, traveling isn’t that easy, and we just heard we are expecting, devastating news. I took a few days to be closer to my fiancee, and to decide what to do next.

After being in contact with the Spanish Dutch Ambassador, we learned that I could fly from the 21st of April to The Netherlands. So, we decided to book the flights, first my fiancee, and three days later I’ll be there.

Unfortunately, she passed away the day before my flight, but luckily my liefde had the chance to spend time with her and to say goodbye. She’s the strongest woman I ever met.

Third learning, be vulnerable, and transparent. I’m happy with the marvelous team I have, and how they help me from the get-go. They understood my situation, and they were super flexible with me.

Fourth learning, be there. The Dutch Ambassador in Spain was super helpful and available through different social media.

Crazy moments, it is time to start dealing with sorrow, knowing that my loved one lose her mom at the beginning of her pregnancy. This isn’t all… we need to deal with the house here in The Netherlands, and many other things.

I took some more days to be with my fiancee and to start helping to pack things and making sure we can be ready to get back home as soon as possible.

But at the same time, I have a full-time job as an Engineering Manager of a group of teams.

It is hard to focus, but I feel great to be able to work remotely. Sadly, many friends didn’t have the same fortune, and they have to go through this crisis without a job, or salary cuts. I’m financially safe, at least we do not have to worry about this.

This is a thought that I continuously have with me during those weeks, it’s a motivational driver for me.

Fourth learning, be grateful. It is good to be sad or even lost, but I do not forget that even in this situation, I feel thankful to be able to work in something I’m passionate about.

Fifth learning, active listening. I’m not the only one suffering, it’s important to listen to my team members, acknowledge their situation, and have a conversation as personal or professional as they feel.

After more or less finding my way, I went through a phase of some automation. The mind is already used not to be home, to be in a small village in The Netherlands instead. We are making our life here, but we know it isn’t the place it used to be.

This phase is mixed with anxiety, we are expecting, we cannot do our checks in the hospital we expected. But we manage to find another clinic near this town, and we could see our baby again 😃.

I could work most of the time, keep reading, and learning how to deal with new remote circumstances. How to be more impactful for my team, and as well thinking about my career. This brings as well some unease, am I doing enough? Am I working on the right thing?

Sixth learning, managing expectations, and anxiety through communication. After this crisis I can say we have a stronger relationship, we had difficult moments and all of them had something in common, we talked.

I shared my state, my availability, and what they could expect from me during those times with my team and manager.

I used this time to share feedback with the team, how much we were doing! How this work is positively impacting to customers. To others, they were doing an excellent job, but I encourage them to take some rest.

Do not let problems to grow, tackle them immediately, it can be painful, but it’s worth it.

Let me specify, this tunnel is long, but we can see some light. Coronavirus as well, is the culprit that we canceled our wedding. But in a few months, we will start a new experience as parents.

We learned through these rough moments, and we will keep learning how to deal with our feelings, how to mourn, how to remember, and at the same time, welcome a new life.

As a professional, I have the conviction that I did my best, and I keep pushing hard to keep improving every day.

Final learnings, life is challenging, and we need to enjoy it to the fullest. We do not know what might happen tomorrow, or in a few weeks or months, but I feel stronger and ready to face any challenge.

During this pandemic, one of the teams launched a product, we had some organizational changes, and we adapted to work remotely.

I have no idea what’s going to happen, how long this crisis is going to last. But I know for us, it is time to mourn in the quietness of home, to enjoy our pregnancy and talk sharing memories. We have to start planning the life with our first newborn.

It is time as well to keep learning and evolving as a professional. Maybe that’s one of the reasons I decided to publish this post to push myself out of my comfort zone (cliche… I know).

I want to dedicate this to my wonderful fiancee Sascia 😘 and snopiedee 👶, and to the memory of my mother-in-l̵a̵w̵love Johanna, we’ve been together for less than three years, but everything we experienced together… it’s a lifetime.

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